Best. Headline. Ever.

"Gay Jesus Musical Canceled in Texas"

Upon reading this article, my first thought was: What made these students think this was EVER going to happen? It's Texas. In Texas, it's OK to "ride a bull," but a sin for 2 people of the same gender to get it on. Ergo, you may not pretend to be gay, especially if you are also pretending to be Jesus.

Why do homophobes have to ruin art? Is it not enough that no one is forcing them to engage in gay activities (i.e. dancing, interior decorating, etc.). Can't they just live and let live? They don't have to see the play. Or, they can see it, and offer their criticism of it. But threats? Over a college play? Are they that bored?

(When I was in college, the students performed a play called "Vampire Lesbians of Sodom." I guess since Jesus wasn't in that, it was OK.)

Finally, why not just do the play anyway. If it is in fact about issues dealt with by gay Christians, that seems really interesting and thought-provoking.

I've heard some say that art isn't art if it doesn't offend someone. I don't know if that's true, but the fact that it does offend some people does not render the play "not art." What's more, this play seems like it had something pertinent and timely to say.

Not having seen the play or the script, I don't want to assume too much about its quality. But the problem with the sort of bullying, threatening behaviors we see on display in Texas is that they censor by fear. And now, people may not get the see the play at all. So how will we know?

What many modern Christians forget is that Jesus was not a peaceful, "go with the flow" guy. On the contrary. He pissed people off everywhere he went. Why? Because he challenged the status quo. Because he stood up for what he believed in, even when it was not popular. Because he was different, and he was not ashamed. He associated with tax collectors, lepers, women of ill repute, and generally, the outcasts, those on the fringe of society at the time.

I don't know if he was gay. That doesn't matter. My point is this: if Jesus lived today, in this world, at this time, I think he'd be in the theater watching that play, not in the streets protesting with his so-called followers.

People Who Say "God Hates Fags" Are Stupil

"Stupil" is a new word I just made up. It applies to the most extreme combinations of "stupidity" and "evil."

stupid + evil = STUPIL.

How are they stupid? Let me count the ways -

(1) Because hating someone for being different is ignorant bigotry. There is no rational or moral justification for such animosity against people who simply are attracted to members of the same gender. So, stupid is the best word I can think of for this.

(2) Because they purport to be "Christian," but clearly have no idea what the primary teachings of Jesus were. When asked what the most important commandment was, Jesus did not say "To hate fags" (sorry, stupil assholes). He answered that the most important commandments - there are 2 - are to love God and love one another. There were no qualifications or conditions, just "love one another." So, the signs would be more accurate if they said "God loves fags."

(3) Because they pretend to know and understand the mind and feelings of their God. Right. I'm sure He (or She or It) spoke to you from the bottom of your Bud Lite can or from your favorite NASCAR driver's ass.

There are more reasons they are stupid, like denying evolution, thinking Obama is a foreign born sleeper terrorist, etc., but let's move on to evil.

They are evil because they not only harbor hate towards innocent people, but because they take to the street encouraging others to do so as well. It is a campaign of hate. Ironically, these stupil fuckers like to compare Obama to Hitler. But in fact, their propaganda campaign against the gays and lesbians (and presumably bisexuals and transsexuals) is a "final solution" type movement. To hate something is to desire its utter destruction. And to hate a group of people is to desire their annihilation. So yeah, they are evil. If you disagree, convince me that I'm wrong!

The good news is these stupil idiots come out in the light of day, so we can see who they people are.

On a lighter note - please notice the one sign depicting the stick figures in position to engage in "rear entry-course" - though apparently without penis or anus. The stick person in the back is like half the height of the stick person in the front. Odd couple. But I say live and let stick figures live.

This Is Just De-Pressing!

This psycho in Massachusetts says she knows her life is going to be "good" - despite being separated from her husband and having her work hours cut - because she can see the image of Jesus in her iron. Jesus Fucking Iron! You know who else that filthy mark looks like? How about Charlie Manson, the Predator alien, and every member of ZZ Top?

I know we get a "I can see Jesus/Mary in my _________________" story every week. They are all depressing to me because these people are finding solace, or miracles, or whatever in mundane shit instead of actually doing something to make their lives better. Faith should lift you up, not make you a pathetic, gullible, stupid loser. If your faith actually makes you a pathetic, gullible, stupid loser (like this idiot with the dirty iron), maybe you should consider atheism.

And where do we get off calling Muslim martyrs crazy? At least they die for what they believe in based on religious teachings. Here in the "In God We Trust" land, we worship toast and dog asses and irons that have weird, shadowy shapes as being messages from God. What the fuck?

Religious zealots all irk the shit out of me, but I can at least respect the ones that base their zeal on scripture and personal experiences. Shadowy images on food, household appliances, and animal asses are apocryphal at best, and moronic at worst. Religion may be the opiate of the masses, but it is also the acid of the stupid.

Stop looking for signs to make you feel all warm and fuzzy and take care of your shit. Go to a couple's counselor to work on your marriage. Go find another job or go back to school. Actually do something to make your life "good," and stop waiting for it to just happen because of your magic-Jesus-iron!

That being said, I wonder if she has given any thought to the fact that she is rubbing a steamy hot Jesus against the crotch of her pants every time she presses them.